Update
Wow, this was such a big weekend for us. I am having a hard time wrapping my mind around it all! Let us catch you up.
We found out on Thursday that our third IUI has failed. In BC, you can access your lab results online through lifelabs. I got the bloodwork done at the end of the day, and the clinic was going to be calling me early Friday morning. But the temptation of knowing that those results were right at my fingertips was too tempting. We had to look. We went outside on the deck at Jon's parents house and opened it together. The emotions in that kind of moment is hard to explain. Charged, emotional, hopeful, guarded. It said negative and we both just took a minute to let that sink in. We both have said that we weren't overly surprised, because after 33 months of "trying", the no's stop being surprising. But the disappointment was so strong it almost knocked me over. There is an ache that settles in and doesn't seem to go away when you realize that your family just isn't going to look like what you envisioned it would. The ache comes in waves, sometimes stronger and more painful than others. This was one of those strong times. When the clinic did call and tell me the results over the phone, I pretended like this was BRAND NEW information, thanked them, and told them we would see them in a few weeks. We have now done 3 Intrauterine Inseminations, which is typically when the clinic recommends moving on. They booked us in for May 25th to have a sit down conversation with Dr. Hudson to go over everything up to this point, and hear his perspective. At this point, we still aren't interested in IVF, and are very keen to just move forward with adoption. But we have promised each other that we will be keep open hearts and open minds, so we will go to the appointment and hear what he has to say.
Saturday was our big garage sale! The donations we received over the past two weeks from people in our community was AMAZING! The garage sale was huge! So much stuff to sell. We were steady all day long, with people constantly stopping by. I was happy with our decision to have it down in Victoria, because we did get so many people coming through. We live in a smaller town, so we wouldn't have had as much traffic for that first one. Our incredible friend Katrina and her mom Anna baked a ton of incredible treats, and had them all wrapped up individually for us to sell! Our daughter set up a lemonade/coffee/baking stand to sell those things, and I am so glad we did that! She brought in $138 on her stand alone! (It helped that people like Joe, a cousin of Jon's, as well as Matt, a good friend of ours, paid $20 each for their drinks from our cute kid ha!) The day was a smashing success. We are so thankful for our family who worked so hard (up at 5am to start setting up!!!) and to all the people who showed up! At the end of a very busy day, we realized that although we had sold so much more than I thought we would, we still had tons left over! So we are going to do another smaller sale, this time at our own house in the Cowichan Valley. After that one, I will let you all in on the total amount raised! What a day. (also, to those wondering why we only had it on one day this weekend, it's because Vancouver Island people do things differently than the rest of us ha! Garage sales out here are only held on Saturdays, which is different than what I, and probably a lot of you, are used to with full weekend garage sales. So one big, full Saturday it was!)
Then today, on Sunday, we went to a big info session with Choices Adoption & Pregnancy Counselling agency. We've been in contact with them already, as I have said before, but this was a really good session to get even more information, and to ask any questions we have. I was like Hermione Granger, eager to ask all the questions, with my hand constantly in the air. Seriously though, it was a good session, and we were able to leave feeling like we now have the information we need to move forward.
The biggest things I wanted to know were: 1) How many placements on average do they have a year (answer: approx. 6-7 although that number can vary of course); 2) How many prospective adoptive parents do they have on a list at a time (Answer: right now, there are only 11. But they will take up to 20 and then the list is full and you go on a wait list); and 3) Finances. When are the due, and how much. The answer to this one was the one that was a bit daunting and discouraging. If and when we decide to submit our application forms, a social worker will contact us within 2 weeks to start our Home Study process. At that point, Stage 1 of finances is due, which is $5000. There are two more stages after that, both with numbers higher than this one. Whoa. Breathe. Exhale. Breathe again. Refocus. Pray. Remember that I am not the one in control.
This biggest thing for us coming out of the session, loaded with information, was the affirmation that this is what we want to do. Time to wrap our minds around this massive amount of money and get brainstorming on fundraisers and ways to be creative. We are excited, overwhelmed, apprehensive, and walking in faith.
We found out on Thursday that our third IUI has failed. In BC, you can access your lab results online through lifelabs. I got the bloodwork done at the end of the day, and the clinic was going to be calling me early Friday morning. But the temptation of knowing that those results were right at my fingertips was too tempting. We had to look. We went outside on the deck at Jon's parents house and opened it together. The emotions in that kind of moment is hard to explain. Charged, emotional, hopeful, guarded. It said negative and we both just took a minute to let that sink in. We both have said that we weren't overly surprised, because after 33 months of "trying", the no's stop being surprising. But the disappointment was so strong it almost knocked me over. There is an ache that settles in and doesn't seem to go away when you realize that your family just isn't going to look like what you envisioned it would. The ache comes in waves, sometimes stronger and more painful than others. This was one of those strong times. When the clinic did call and tell me the results over the phone, I pretended like this was BRAND NEW information, thanked them, and told them we would see them in a few weeks. We have now done 3 Intrauterine Inseminations, which is typically when the clinic recommends moving on. They booked us in for May 25th to have a sit down conversation with Dr. Hudson to go over everything up to this point, and hear his perspective. At this point, we still aren't interested in IVF, and are very keen to just move forward with adoption. But we have promised each other that we will be keep open hearts and open minds, so we will go to the appointment and hear what he has to say.
Saturday was our big garage sale! The donations we received over the past two weeks from people in our community was AMAZING! The garage sale was huge! So much stuff to sell. We were steady all day long, with people constantly stopping by. I was happy with our decision to have it down in Victoria, because we did get so many people coming through. We live in a smaller town, so we wouldn't have had as much traffic for that first one. Our incredible friend Katrina and her mom Anna baked a ton of incredible treats, and had them all wrapped up individually for us to sell! Our daughter set up a lemonade/coffee/baking stand to sell those things, and I am so glad we did that! She brought in $138 on her stand alone! (It helped that people like Joe, a cousin of Jon's, as well as Matt, a good friend of ours, paid $20 each for their drinks from our cute kid ha!) The day was a smashing success. We are so thankful for our family who worked so hard (up at 5am to start setting up!!!) and to all the people who showed up! At the end of a very busy day, we realized that although we had sold so much more than I thought we would, we still had tons left over! So we are going to do another smaller sale, this time at our own house in the Cowichan Valley. After that one, I will let you all in on the total amount raised! What a day. (also, to those wondering why we only had it on one day this weekend, it's because Vancouver Island people do things differently than the rest of us ha! Garage sales out here are only held on Saturdays, which is different than what I, and probably a lot of you, are used to with full weekend garage sales. So one big, full Saturday it was!)
Just so excited about her little lemonade stand :)
Then today, on Sunday, we went to a big info session with Choices Adoption & Pregnancy Counselling agency. We've been in contact with them already, as I have said before, but this was a really good session to get even more information, and to ask any questions we have. I was like Hermione Granger, eager to ask all the questions, with my hand constantly in the air. Seriously though, it was a good session, and we were able to leave feeling like we now have the information we need to move forward.
The biggest things I wanted to know were: 1) How many placements on average do they have a year (answer: approx. 6-7 although that number can vary of course); 2) How many prospective adoptive parents do they have on a list at a time (Answer: right now, there are only 11. But they will take up to 20 and then the list is full and you go on a wait list); and 3) Finances. When are the due, and how much. The answer to this one was the one that was a bit daunting and discouraging. If and when we decide to submit our application forms, a social worker will contact us within 2 weeks to start our Home Study process. At that point, Stage 1 of finances is due, which is $5000. There are two more stages after that, both with numbers higher than this one. Whoa. Breathe. Exhale. Breathe again. Refocus. Pray. Remember that I am not the one in control.
This biggest thing for us coming out of the session, loaded with information, was the affirmation that this is what we want to do. Time to wrap our minds around this massive amount of money and get brainstorming on fundraisers and ways to be creative. We are excited, overwhelmed, apprehensive, and walking in faith.
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